Things Doanie Likes

Skittles For Every Touchdown

Doanie — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 19:38:22 +0000

Here I go, trying to talk about sports again. Marshawn Lynch of the Seattle Seahawks was filmed eating Skittles after scoring a touchdown in their winning game against the Philadelphia Eagles. Why Skittles? Because that’s what his mommy used to give him when he played football in high school After the game, Skittles offered him a 2 year’s supply of the feel-the-rainbow candies.

What a Crock of Stock!

Doanie — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 21:56:49 +0000

Reached for a nice carton of chicken stock and –WHAt THe..! Whole Foods, you’re not gonna trick me into buying $35 broth this time!..

Funniest & Scariest NYC Hotel Review – Criminals, Hookers & Bed Bugs Oh My!

Doanie — Thu, 17 Nov 2011 18:09:19 +0000

I had never heard about the Glenwood Hotel in Brooklyn until it was mentioned in the news as being the location of a terrible crime. As I am often researching hotels for business and friends, I am well aware about the pitiful conditions of NYC’s hotel industry (tiny dirty rooms, exorbitant prices, too good to be true, etc.) BUT THIS IS BY FAR THE WORST OF THE WORST OF THE WORST places to stay I have ever come across. The few reviews out there all say sleeping on the street would be better and describe what is often the most terrifying/traumatic experience of their lives. The review below made me laugh in fear so hard that I found it difficult to get past some of the words. Please enjoy and please be warned:

DemianC from Seattle, WA – July 4, 2010

Which came first, the bugs or the guests?

“So, looking for a NY getaway on the cheap? Have I got a suggestion for you! The streets, or hey, just ride the subway all night. Even the internet wouldn’t want to publish pictures of my feet, legs, arm or back, due to the insane amount of bedbug bites I have on me. In roughly 72 hours, I was able to get about 9 hours of sleep. The room is smaller than your closet. “I don’t have a closet” you say? It’s still bigger! My first night, it was roughly 90 plus degrees in there. But that was the comfortable part. The ceiling is a screen door. There was a guy constantly sitting right outside my room who looked like the evil love child of Mickey Rourke and Gary Busey. The gent “sleeping next to my room, loved to wake up at 5 every morning and hock phlegmies for an hour or so straight. And that is when he stopped snoring. He also liked to cut some long gas passages, the last one I clocked at roughly 23 seconds. My guess, he was no more wanting to use their bathroom than I or the rats were. The rats, you don’t see them so much as hear them, and I think they were weary of the surroundings as well. The guests, many of them residents. The ladies were kind of nice, because they’re hookers namely. The evil creep behind the cage was somehow in cahoots with them. One guy likes to sit in the lobby and sleep and drool ropes. I also saw him going into the bathroom, his pants were not part of the deal, but he did have his hands over his crotch and buttocks as the bathroom trip clearly got started before he could get there. The shower was scary, and if you can sit on their toilets, you will likely get leprosy. And then, the bedbugs. Oh, the bedbugs are RAMPANT! In my 8 to 9 hours of sleep over three days, I was able to get hundreds, yes hundreds of bites. And I never once pulled back the sheets. No one offered to wash or change them, so you can still see my bloodstains if you go now. It is not just that they have bedbugs, they are the SOURCE of the bedbugs. NY is supposed to be having an issue with them, and if the D.O.H. would stop accepting bribes, and burn the place down, then burn the ashes, the bedbug problem would likely end. Not just in NY, but the whole wide world. Seriously folks, graveyards are a less creepy place to sleep. They don’t mention their name on Craigslist, but it is the $30 ad with the tiny bed. It’s so bad, you may just want to avoid Brooklyn altogether. I’m going to go write a horror movie about the place, and you know what? None of it would be fiction.”

I honestly can’t wait until DemianC publishes his first screenplay or book.

Yay – The Doanie Sweater Now In Stores!

Doanie — Fri, 04 Nov 2011 15:19:00 +0000

I knew I was going to have a sweater named after me (and designed-inspired by me!) in Club Monaco this season, but I didn’t know I’d be getting a little signage too! Love it so much I nabbed the Doanie in 2 colors this morning! Short in the front, long in the back so it covers the bootie, and a deep v-neck — what more could I want!

PS. Just found it on shopbop.com.

I Love French Bulldogs & Babies. Especially When They Are the Same.

Doanie — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 19:59:45 +0000

This is just, just, just… the best.

Geico

Doanie — Tue, 27 Sep 2011 22:17:44 +0000

There are really terrible stories about police brutality against the protesters of Occupy Wall Street who are were marching from Wall Street to Union Square to protest corporate greed and other economy issues people are tired of living in. But I just wanted to post this photo of the events (from this Gothamist story about the cop who allegedly pepper-sprayed protesters unnecessarily over the weekend). I look at this photo, and the first thing I think is: Geico commercial.

Bad Baby Costume

Doanie — Wed, 07 Sep 2011 22:03:42 +0000

I know these things are not supposed to be funny, and usually I am terribly bothered about any kind of child exploitation — but this is just too ridiculous. I mean, how in the world did this pageant mom on TLC’s Toddlers and Tiaras ever get the notion that this was in any way a GOOD idea?? Like this Gothamist article points out, mom didn’t even choose to dress her up like the cleaned-up hooker that Juliet Robert’s character in Pretty Woman becomes in the end of this 1990 movie — she chose to dress up her baby as the icky-dirty-shunned hooker from the beginning of the movie! And that baby spray tan is just ludicrous… she looks like she’s wearing old lady stockings all over.

5.8 East Coast Earthquake Destruction

Doanie — Tue, 23 Aug 2011 19:30:44 +0000

From jmckinley: “Thanks to all of you for your kind words of support, as we look to recover from the devastation of today’s quake!”

Kardashians in Order

Doanie — Mon, 22 Aug 2011 19:23:33 +0000

Ok, yah, Kim got married this weekend, the family launched a Sears line, yada yada yada… business as usual for the Kardashians. But I just came across this photo of all the Kardashian ladies and, like a geek, tried to figure out the method to the madness, the order of chaos, the sequential series that they are all standing in… and then I figured it out. They are standing in order of most attractive, right to left. High fashion model on the right, Rosie O’Donnell with makeup on the left.

Sweet Zombie Love

Doanie — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 21:21:14 +0000

Came across this awesome photographer, Amanda Rynda, who shot this couple’s engagement photos with a sweet zombie theme. That pretty much means.. they are an awesome couple.

Don’t worry – she does no-zombie engagement photos, too…